Proverbs 15:20-21 A wise son maketh a GLAD (śāmaḥ, pro. saw-makh’) father: but a foolish man despiseth his mother. 21 Folly is JOY (śimḥâ, pro. sim-khaw’) to him that is destitute of wisdom: but a man of understanding walketh uprightly.

Good Leadership Is Important To The Future Of The House

In the Bible, the word “house” is often used not for a brick and stick building, but for a family, a community, a Church, or a country. God told Noah, “Come THOU AND ALL THY HOUSE into the Ark” (Genesis 7:1). God told Abraham, “Get thee out of thy country, and FROM THY FATHER’S HOUSE” (Genesis 12:1). When Pharaoh took Sarai to be his wife, the Bible says “the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house”.

For one generation to the next to have a healthy “house”, the father must teach his children the ways of Christ. The child must heed the instruction of the father if he would be a blessing to his mother. The John Schultz Commentary notes:

“What links these two verses together is the theme of joy and enjoyment. As in English, both words are related in Hebrew, though not identical. Samach means “to brighten up,” “cause to rejoice.” Simchah means “gladness” or “glee.”

The child who is wise, seeking the will of God in his life, “brightens up” his own father’s life. The Godly father trained him to love Jesus. The Bible says that if we:

Proverbs 22:6 (KJV) Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

The child properly trained by the father or head of the home may drift from God for a while (remember the Prodigal Son, Luke 15:11-32), but later in life the lessons taught young will come to the son’s remembrance. Throughout the Scripture God honored the creation order (Genesis 2:21-22) by calling MEN to lead their families in teaching the Word of God to the children. When God decided to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah, He first went to Abraham, saying:

Genesis 18:17-19 (ESV) … Shall I hide from Abraham what I am about to do, 18 seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him? 19 For I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing righteousness and justice, so that the Lord may bring to Abraham what he has promised him.

God told us men in the New Covenant:

Ephesians 6:4 (ESV) Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Where there are no fathers in the home, the women should take the responsibility of training the child in the Way of Christ. In the case of Timothy, Paul’s convert to the faith, the Apostle told him:

2 Timothy 3:14-15 (ESV) … continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it 15 and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.

Timothy’s father was an unbelieving Greek and his mother was converted Jew. The mother taught Timothy the Way of Truth.

Though we know little of the father from Scripture, it was evident that his father did not teach him Scripture. As a wayward father (either physically or spiritually) Timothy’s mother Eunice and his grandmother Lois (2 Timothy 1:5) taught him the way of God. Where the father – either absent or unbelieving – will not do his job, the mother must take over. I was raised in that type of environment. Though neither father nor mother were faithful believers when I was growing up, my grandmother Elma and grandfather Bud taught me the Word of God. Had they not planted the seed, I probably would not be saved today!

Proverbs 15:20 A wise SON maketh a GLAD (śāmaḥ, pro. saw-makh’) father: but a foolish man despiseth his mother.

Word Study: The SON (bēn) who learns the lessons of the faith from the father brings great gladness to the older man. Notice that the same child, if FOOLISH (kᵊsîl, pro. Kes-eel’) or SILLY is not called a SON (bēn), but a MAN (‘āḏām). The name ‘āḏām was what God called the original creation.

The gender of the boy is not changed – he is still a male – but the position of the child has changed.

Honoring his father by following the Heavenly Father the child is a SON. Dishonoring his father by ignoring the Heavenly Father the child is a MAN. The mother has a very strong tie to her child. When the MAN decides to ignore the way of God, and to seek self-gratification and fleshly sensuality, the mother grieves. The Bible tells children:

Exodus 20:12 (ESV) Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.

Ephesians 6:1-3 (ESV) Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

The commandment to honor your parents comes with a promise, “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land”. The child that refuses to honor his parents is headed toward a harsh life, and a premature death. This brings anguish to his mother!

Worldly Foolishness Will Not Build A Solid House

Proverbs 15:21 Folly is JOY (śimḥâ, pro. sim-khaw’) to him that is destitute of wisdom: but a man of understanding walketh uprightly.

Illustrate: I like to watch horror movies. I remarked to my wife the other day that every horror movie has a common theme. Those who are terrorized by something bad, put themselves in a bad situation in the first place. I have never seen a horror movie that began in a Church service on Sunday morning! This illustrates the statement, “a man of understanding (tāḇûn) walketh uprightly (yāšar)”. Literally the text reads:

“the INTELLIGENT man walks the STRAIGHT WAY”

Our Lord Jesus said in Matthew 7:13-14 (NKJV) “Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. 14 Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.”

The upright or straight way is the Way of Christ. To follow Christ is to find blessings in this life. The Bible says “make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated, but rather be healed. Pursue peace with all, and HOLINESS, WITHOUT WHICH NO ONE WILL SEE THE LORD” (Hebrews 12:12-15).

The world teaches us to divorce ourselves from the House of God and to “follow your heart”. Dr. Thaddeus Williams wrote in his book Don’t Follow Your Heart:

“For years my children and I have played a game together called Spot the Lie. If they can identify a false idea in whatever we happen to be watching, they earn one dollar. When she was nine years old, my daughter Holland (“Dutch” for short) came cheerfully bounding down the stairs, saying, “You owe me another dollar!” “What did you find this time, Dutch?” “The commercial told me I should follow my heart,” she answered. “Okay, so where’s the lie?” I asked. Her answer, and I recall it verbatim, was, “Daddy, I don’t want to follow my own heart. My heart is fallen. I’d way rather follow God’s heart.” Cue the proud daddy tears. Let’s just say she earned five dollars for that one.”

According to recent polls, “84% of Americans believe the “highest goal of life is to enjoy it as much as possible,” 86% believe that to be fulfilled requires you to “pursue the things you desire most,” while 91% affirm that “the best way to find yourself is by looking within yourself.””

Ungodly Counsel Will Destroy The House

Proverbs 15:22 Without COUNSEL {sôḏ, pro. sode}purposes are disappointed: but in the multitude of counsellors they are established.

The word translated “COUNSEL” is a Hebrew word which means “to meet together in closed session, to meet privately with a inner group of friends who are well known, or who have much in common”. We see the word translated thus in:

Jeremiah 23:18 (KJV) For who hath stood in the COUNSEL {sôḏ of the LORD, and hath perceived and heard his word? who hath marked his word, and heard it?

In some places the word is translated “SECRET”, as in:

Job 15:8 (KJV) Hast thou heard the SECRET {sôḏ} of God? and dost thou restrain wisdom to thyself?

Psalm 25:14 (KJV) The SECRET {sôḏ} of the LORD is with them that fear him; and he will shew them his covenant.

Amos 3:7 (KJV) Surely the Lord GOD will do nothing, but He revealeth his SECRET {sôḏ} unto his servants the prophets.

Or as “INWARD” in:

Job 19:19 (KJV) All my INWARD {sôḏ} friends abhorred me: and they whom I loved are turned against me.

Those who turn against “COUNSEL”, Godly counsel, will find that their purposes and plans will fail. Of course, you need to choose Godly counselors. Those you consult should be willing to listen to your plans, but they should also be well acquainted with you, your strengths and your weaknesses. It is important to realize that our Lord Jesus had an inner ring of friends – Peter, James and John, that He often consulted and specially trained. Jesus was not learning from this inner ring, but He was training them for important positions in the Church He would found.

The best Counselor you can refer to is God Himself. His Word counsels us, just as Jesus counseled the disciples. God revealeth his SECRET/ COUNSEL {sôḏ} unto his servants.

We read “in the multitude of counselors” your purposes or plans are established. If you expect to be blessed, or to do great things for God, you need to heed your godly counselors. King Rehoboam discovered the folly of trying to do everything on your own without heeding your counselors. In 1 Kings 12 Rehoboam was crowned King of Israel. The Ten Northern Tribes of Israel, led by Jeroboam presented themselves to the King to ask that their taxes be lowered. Their plea:

“Lower taxes and we will serve you” (1 Kings 12:4)

Rehoboam sent them away for three days while he met with his older counselors. The counselors said “If you will meet their needs, and speak with kindness to them, they will be your servants forever” (vs 7). This was good advise. But Rehoboam was arrogant with the pride of a new King. He went to his his buddies he grew up with and asked these ungodly men what they thought. Their advise: bear down on the people, answer them roughly, and tell them that their taxes will INCREASE.

Listening to stupid and ill advised counsel, Rehoboam was left with egg on his face – while the Ten Northern Tribes rebelled and left the House of David.

The people told Rehoboam, “To your tents, O Israel! Now see to YOUR OWN HOUSE, O David!”. The rift between the Northern Tribes and Judah has lasted unto this day. The breach will not be fixed until the Lord Jesus Christ comes back to this earth to rule over Israel in the Millennial Kingdom.

The Tongue Used Properly Can Make Or Break A House

Proverbs 15:23 A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it!

When God called Moses to go to Pharaoh to demand the release of Israel from Egypt, that humble and grand old saint told the Lord:

Exodus 4:10 (AP) “Oh my Lord, I am not eloquent. I was not eloquent when you called me, nor am I now a great speaker. I am slow of speech, and of tongue”.

The Lord told Moses, “Who has made man’s mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak” (Exodus 4:11-12, ESV). Had Moses remembered this, and allowed God to always guide his tongue, he would not have misused his tongue at Meribah, and been forbidden to enter the Promised Land (Numbers 20:8-12). When we allow God to guide our tongues, it is always more productive than defaulting to the flesh.

God gave us our lips, our tongues, and our breath. We were told in Proverbs 12:13&14, “The WICKED is ENSNARED by the transgression of his lips …. but a MAN will be satisfied with GOOD BY THE FRUIT OF HIS MOUTH”. When we let God guide our speech, the word of our mouths bring joy and happiness to our homes and to the House of God. The Bible tells us the story of Nabal the Calebite, who mocked King David’s delegation and refused to feed his army. King David armed his men, ready to destroy Nabal and his lands for the arrogance of his tongue. When Nabal’s wife Abigail heard of this, she carried provision to David’s approaching army. Humbling herself, Abigail said:

1 Samuel 25:25-28 (ESV) Let not my lord regard this worthless fellow, Nabal, for as his name is, so is he. Nabal is his name, and folly is with him. But I your servant did not see the young men of my lord, whom you sent. 26 Now then, my lord, as the Lord lives, and as your soul lives, because the Lord has restrained you from blood guilt and from saving with your own hand, now then let your enemies and those who seek to do evil to my lord be as Nabal. 27 And now let this present that your servant has brought to my lord be given to the young men who follow my lord. 28 Please forgive the trespass of your servant.

A misplaced word can destroy a home, kill a house. The House of Nabal would have been surely destroyed had it not been for Abigail’s humble intervention. The Bible says, “a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (Proverbs 25:11). Those who allow God’s Word to flow through them, to control their tongues – these words are gold in a setting of silver. On the other hand, the misused tongue is like a match in a dry forest (James 3:5-6), destroying all that it is around.

Dr. Constable’s Commentary on Proverbs notes:

“It is not just important to speak the truth. One must also speak appropriately in view of the time, place, and circumstances. The right thing said at the right time (“a timely word”) can be a source of joy and happiness to many people.”

Following The Way of Christ Leads To Life, Whereas Following The Way Of The World Leads To Death

Proverbs 15:24 The way of life is ABOVE to the wise, that he may depart from hell beneath.

The WISE or those who are followers of Christ are blessed with life. It is God Who gives life. Man cannot create life, neither can the angels. Only God. God says “all SOULS ARE MINE” (Ezekiel 18:4). To anger God Who gave you life is to play with death. The Psalmist declared:

Psalm 30:5 (KJV) in {God’s} FAVOR IS LIFE

and we have previously read:

Proverbs 12:28 (KJV) In the way of righteousness is life; and in the pathway thereof there is no death.

Our Lord Jesus told us “The Father’s COMMANDMENT is LIFE EVERLASTING” (John 12:50). The Apostle warned us, “to be FLESHLY MINDED IS DEATH, but to be SPIRITUALLY MINDED IS LIFE and peace” (Romans 8:6).

If you continue to walk in darkness, it will not be too long before you stumble and fall into the pit of hell – both on this earth and in the afterlife!

The benefit of giving your life to Jesus is that He not only keeps you out of hell when you pass from this life – but He keeps your present life from being a living hell. The wonderful Gospel Singer Andre Crouch (who is now with the Lord) sang a song “If Heaven Were Never Promise To Me”. Part of the song went:

If heaven never was promised to me,
Neither God’s promise to live eternally.
It’s been worth just having the Lord in my life.
Living in a world of darkness,
You brought me the light.

Ti live the life that God designed you to live, you must follow the God Who gave you that life. God will not be a spare tire. God will not be an afterthought. God will not be a panic button, a fire alarm, a radon detector. God gave you life. He knows how you should live that life. When we bow up in pride, and say “My body, My life”, making ourselves into a god, we walk a dangerous and destructive path. The wages of sin is always DEATH (Romans 6:23).

Proverbs 15:25 The Lord will destroy the house of the proud: but he will establish the BORDER {gᵊḇûl, the place or the boundaries} of the widow.

The most powerful King in the world in his day was Nebuchadnezzar, the King of Babylon. Because he was arrogant before God in all his riches and power, saying:

Daniel 4:30 (NKJV) Is not this great Babylon, that I have built for a royal dwelling by my mighty power and for the honor of my majesty?

As the words left his mouth, the House of Nebuchadnezzar fell (vs 31). He lost his mind, and became like an ox in the field, eating grass for “seven periods of time”. When Nebuchadnezzar repented, he said:

Daniel 4:34-35 (NKJV) I blessed the Most High and praised and honored Him who lives forever: For His dominion is an everlasting dominion, And His kingdom is from generation to generation. 35 All the inhabitants of the earth are reputed as nothing; He does according to His will in the army of heaven And among the inhabitants of the earth. No one can restrain His hand Or say to Him, “What have You done?”

The widow who has no one to rely on but the Lord – and who does so – will find that God will bless her life. But the PROUD, the arrogant who will not hear the Lord, He will destroy their house. What God has given, God can take away. Let me ask you – has God helped you overcome a great disease? Has God given you riches, popularity, talent? Has God saved the life of someone you love? What God has given, God can take away. I say again, What God has given, God can take away. I have seen it, and know it to be true. Honor and bless your house by following the way of Christ. May God touch your hearts with his Word. Amen.