Respect Is Right

Ephesians 6:1-9 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. 2 Honor thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; 3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. 4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ; 6 Not with eye service, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart; 7 With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men: 8 Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free. 9 And, ye masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threatening: knowing that your Master also is in heaven; neither is there respect of persons with him.

On my way to Church I stopped at Wendy’s for a couple of sausage biscuits. I found something a little extra there, something I’m not used to.

Good customer service.

The young woman who manned the speaker and the window smiled, and even called me “Honey”. She was a middle aged woman, but with a sweet smile. She’s working in an often thankless job, but I thanked her. She showed me respect as the customer, and I showed her respect as the worker.

As a Pastor I do a lot of things that no one knows I do. A Pastor is an “Overseer”, and one of the things I oversee is this property. I have to schedule fire inspections for the facilities. There’s periodic maintenance – like changing the heating and air filters that has to be done. As a registered non-profit in the State of Tennessee I have to file our annual report with the Secretary of State. One of the things I have to do is make sure our facilities are treated for pests and varmits.

For many years we were with a pretty good company, but recently that company was sold to a competitor. The original company would have a representative CALL me and set up an appointment to treat the facilities. They were so good, I got them to do my own home as well. The company was reasonable. They treated both of our buildings for $75 per quarter, and my home for $60 per quarter.

Then the new company took over.

They didn’t call to schedule. The young man who did the scheduling called Johnny would come unannounced, helter skelter. Yesterday he texted me out of the blue, saying:

“I currently have you scheduled for the 14^th to come out and apply your exterior winter barrier. Please let me know if you have any questions.”

I texted back, “I need to know WHEN”. Then I waited three hours for a response. Finally, I picked up the phone and CALLED Johnny. No answer, but it went to voice mail. I told him “This is the Pastor at Riverview. I need to know WHEN you are coming tomorrow. I have appointments I have to keep, and so does my wife. Please CALL ME at 931-982-xxxx because I’d like to discuss it with you and get a time on the calendar that works for both of us”. Then I waited. About an hour and a half later he TEXTED me back “It will probably be between one and three”.

I called another company I had heard of. The young man actually ANSWERED the phone, and said “What can I do for you, Mr. Buffaloe?” I told him what I needed, and asked if he’d be able to do our facilities at the same rate. He was very polite. Yes, they would match the previous cost. And WHILE ON THE PHONE we pulled out our calendars, and set the time for his company to come. When I got off the phone, I TEXTED Johnny “I’ve got someone else to do it from now on. Thanks.”

He “liked” the text.

One young man, because of respect, gained hundreds of dollars a year for his company. The other young man lost hundreds of dollars a year for his company, and did not care. What’s the difference between these two young men? One learned respect from the cradle, taught by parents and grandparents who knew they were raising future leaders. The other was taught from the cradle that HE IS IN CHARGE, and that HE IS THE CENTER OF THE WORLD. That’s not good for a business. That’s not good for America.

Respect Must Be Taught From The Cradle

As Paul comes to the end of his letter to the Church at Ephesus, he addresses the children first. There are only TWO TIMES in the New Testament that children are DIRECTLY ADDRESSED. It is here,

Ephesians 6:1 CHILDREN, OBEY {hypakouō} your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

And in …

Colossians 3:20 CHILDREN, OBEY {hypakouō} your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.

In the ancient world children were seen as incomplete persons, and in many cases were regarded as not fully human. In the Roman world, the father had the right to EXPOSE children to the elements, often unto death. Children were often sold as slaves. Disobedient children were executed.

The early Church would often rescue children that were cast out of their Roman homes because they were illegitimate or disabled. An early Christian teaching called the Didache stated:

“You shall not murder a child by abortion nor kill what is begotten.”

God’s people are to value children. Though children had no rights while in the home, God commanded His people:

Deuteronomy 6:4-7 … Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: 5 And thou shalt LOVE THE LORD THY GOD with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. 6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7 And thou SHALT TEACH THEM DILIGENTLY TO YOUR CHILDREN…

Children were to be taught that loving God is most important, and that the Scripture is sacred. “For the WORD OF GOD IS RIGHT; and all his works are done in truth”.

Among early Christians, children were seen as gifts from God, a stewardship entrusted to their care.

The Psalmist said in Psalms 127:3-5 “Lo, children [are] an heritage of the LORD: [and] the fruit of the womb [is his] reward. (4) As ARROWS [are] IN THE HAND OF A MIGHTY MAN; so [are] children of the youth. (5) Happy [is] the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.”

Children are represented by God as “ ARROWS IN THE HAND OF A MIGHTY MAN”. In the ancient world, ARROWS and the bow were what was used for national defense rather than BULLETS and a GUN. Children that are raised in the “NURTURE AND ADMONITION OF THE LORD” (Ephesians 6:4) will be SOLID CITIZENS that will help protect the nation from the enemy. This is why the Psalmist said “they shall speak with the enemies in the gate”. The enemies of the nation will not get in the walls. Children that are raised to love God and His Word, who are taught the value of respect, will be strong men and women that add to their community and their nation.

It starts in the cradle.
It continues at the Table.
If not, they will grow up and make the nation unstable.

What is the first thing children must be taught? Is it their ABCs? No, the first thing is:

Ephesians 6:1 CHILDREN, OBEY {hypakouō} your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

Word Study: The word rendered “OBEY” is the Greek hypakouō, which means “to submit yourself so as to attentively listen, to hear and understand the command and to act on it”. This same word is used in the other text that addresses children directly, Colossians 3:20 CHILDREN, OBEY {hypakouō}. Children must be taught obedience by the parents. The parent is the FIRST authority figure that the child meets. Parents, children don’t need you to be their friends. They’ll make friends. They need you to teach them to RESPECT AUTHORITY.

Ephesians 6:1 CHILDREN, OBEY {hypakouō} your parents IN THE LORD

That phrase “IN THE LORD” means that the parent should NEVER ask the child to do anything that is unrighteous.

In verse 4 we read:

Ephesians 6:4 And, ye FATHERS, PROVOKE NOT YOUR CHILDREN TO WRATH: but bring them up in the NURTURE {paideia} and ADMONITION {nouthesia} of the Lord.

Word Study: Why are FATHERS mentioned here and not mothers? I suspect it is because of what I mentioned earlier, that in the Roman world (one Paul was well acquainted with) the FATHERS could EXPOSE a child, SELL a child, or outright KILL a child without any legal recompense. Christians should treat their children with love and respect. They are to be “brought UP in the NURTURE {paideia} and ADMONITION {nouthesia} OF THE LORD”. Let’s look at these two words that the Christian parent is commanded to do to the child WHILE THEY ARE CHILDREN. The word “NURTURE {paideia} means to instruct so as to increase virtue, to correct with chastisement, to disciple or discipline”. The same word is used in the Septuagint in

Proverbs 3:11-12 (Septuagint) My son, despise not the CHASTENING {paideia} of the Lord; nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: 12 for whom the Lord loves, he rebukes, and SCOURGES {paideuō} every son whom he receives.

The parent’s punishment or correction of the child should NEVER exceed that which God would do. Our Heavenly Father corrects us when we as believers get off course. But His correction is done because HE LOVES US. We should love our children, and raise them to love Jesus.

Ephesians 6:2 HONOR {timaō} thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise;

Word Study: The first thing that children should be taught is obedience to the things of God. The second thing they must be taught is respect for their parents, which is respect for authority. The word translated “HONOR {timaō}” which means “to affix value to, to venerate or revere”.

Children are not commanded to LOVE their parents.
They are not commanded to AGREE WITH their parents.
They are to OBEY and REVERE their parents.

In the Bible the only time Jesus is mentioned as a Child (not a baby in Bethlehem, but a Child) is in Luke 2:41-52. This was an incident that happened when Jesus was twelve years old (Luke 2:42). Mary and Joseph left Nazareth to go to Jerusalem for the Feast of the Passover. When traveling in those days, people often joined walking caravans (Luke 2:44) as large groups, protecting themselves from highwaymen and other criminal elements. These caravans traveled about 15-20 miles each day, and it was roughly 65-70 miles from Nazareth to Jerusalem. It took them around 4-5 days to get from Nazareth to Jerusalem with Jesus. The Bible tells us that:

Luke 2:43-45 (LSB) as they were returning {to Nazareth}, after finishing the days of the Feast, the BOY JESUS STAYED BEHIND IN JERUSALEM. But HIS PARENTS DID NOT KNOW. 44 But supposing Him to be in the caravan, they went a day’s journey, and they began searching for Him among their relatives and acquaintances. 45 When they did not find Him, THEY RETURNED TO JERUSALEM SEARCHING FOR HIM.

They looked for Jesus FOR THREE DAYS! We are told

Luke 2:46-48 (LSB) … after three days they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both listening to them and asking them questions. 47 And all who heard Him were astounded at His understanding and His answers. 48 When {Mary and Joseph} saw Him, they were astonished

Mary is distraught! She’s been looking for her Son for OVER FOUR DAYS, for they traveled “a day’s journey” (Luke 2:44) before discovering Him missing. Distraught, Mary asks Jesus:

Luke 2:48 (LSB) “Child, why have You treated us this way? Behold, Your father and I have been anxiously searching for You.”

Our Lord Jesus – God in perfect sinless humanity – told His mother:

Luke 2:49 (LSB) “Why is it that you were searching for Me? Did you not know that I had to be in My Father’s house?”

Here is Jesus! Born of a virgin according to prophecy, “God with us” (Matthew 1:23). This Jesus, though but 12 years old in human flesh, is Himself Eternal God. The Father said of the pre-incarnate Jesus:

Psalm 45:6 (LSB) Your THRONE, O GOD, IS FOREVER AND EVER; A scepter of uprightness is the scepter of Your kingdom. (see also Hebrews 1:8)

It is Jesus of Whom the Bible says,

Colossians 1:15-17 (LSB) {Jesus} is the IMAGE OF THE INVISIBLE GOD, the firstborn of all creation. 16 For IN HIM ALL THINGS WERE CREATED, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things have been created through Him and for Him. 17 And HE IS BEFORE ALL THINGS, And IN HIM ALL THINGS HOLD TOGETHER.

Jesus Christ is the earthly manifestation of the Eternal God. Jesus said, “If you have seen Me, you have seen the Father” (John 14:9; John 1:18) and “I and the Father are ONE” (John 10:30). Mary and Joseph knew that Jesus was great, for they were at His incarnation. But as a mother, Mary lamented. “Son, we were anxious for You! We couldn’t find You”. Jesus told her simply, “Why were you searching for Me? Didn’t you know I’d be in My Father’s house?” The Bible says:

Luke 2:50-51 (LSB) {Mary and Joseph} did not understand the statement which He had spoken to them. 51 And He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and HE CONTINUED IN SUBJECTION TO THEM, and His mother was treasuring all these things in her heart.

Though Eternal God in the flesh, “HE CONTINUED IN SUBJECTION TO THEM”. Jesus went back to Jerusalem with Mary and Joseph. He modeled how a child should do. Children are commanded of God to honor and respect the authority of their parents. Let’s look at the text one more time:

Ephesians 6:2-3 Honor thy father and mother; which is THE FIRST COMMANDMENT WITH PROMISE; 3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.

When God gave the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:2-17), in the Fifth Commandment God said:

Exodus 20:12 (LSB) Honor your father and your mother, that YOUR DAYS MAY BE PROLONGED in the land which Yahweh your God gives you.

When God gave the Fifth Commandment to revere the parents, there was a promise attached to it. The child who listens to the Godly parent will live a long life in the land that God gives them. Satan does not know all things, but he does know this: if he can get you to following his direction, he can lead you to a premature and needless death. The “wages of sin is death” (Romans 6:23). The child taught by a Godly parent will live a better quality life than the one who is not taught. It’s a fact!

Teaching Respect And Reverence Effects
The Future Of The Nation

Ephesians 6:5-7 SERVANTS {doulos}, BE OBEDIENT TO THEM THAT ARE YOUR MASTERS ACCORDING TO THE FLESH, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, AS UNTO CHRIST; 6 Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but AS THE SERVANTS {doulos} OF CHRIST, doing the will of God from the heart; 7 With good will doing service, AS TO THE LORD, and not to men:

A child in a Godly household learns to honor and revere authority, to submit to the employer and to do a good job. Here the Apostle uses the word “SERVANTS” {doulos}, which is frequently used in scripture to describe slaves or people who have sold themselves into servitude. It isn’t always used for a slave, but to someone under another.

If you have a job, if you work for an employer, you are to serve in that job obediently and respectfully.

If a young person is raised to think the world revolves around them, then they will grow up to be bad employees, or unemployable. They will grow up fighting against law enforcement, whether local, state, or federal. In the Church, Jesus tells each believer:

Matthew 20:27 (KJV) And whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your SERVANT {doulos} (see also Mark 10:44

Greatness in the Kingdom of Heaven is based not on a title, but on serving one another. As Jesus Christ our Lord served us by lowering Himself to a manger and a small town and the Cross, so are we who are His to lower ourselves! The Apostle Paul called himself – though an Apostle – “a SERVANT {doulos} of Jesus Christ” (Romans 1:1).

The child raised and saved by the Grace of God, the Christian, is to be the very best employee of the place where he works. We are to serve our employers “AS TO THE LORD, and not to men”. We do what we do representing Jesus so that, when others see us, they see a good testimony.

Jesus left Heaven when He didn’t have to, to serve us. Jesus stayed on a Cross when He didn’t have to, to bless us. We are called to honor God by how we serve the employer.

Ephesians 6:8 Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, THE SAME SHALL HE RECEIVE OF THE LORD, whether he be bond or free.

The Lord will bless us as we serve the Lord by serving others. There is a judgment day coming, dear believer, whether lost or saved. One day we will all stand before the Lord. On that day, those who love Jesus and live for Jesus will be rewarded for that which they did for Jesus. But to those who reject the Lord, who do not serve as He has called us to serve,

Romans 14:10-12 (LSB) we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. 11 For it is written, “As I live, says the Lord, to Me EVERY KNEE SHALL BOW, And EVERY TONGUE SHALL CONFESS to God.” 12 So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God.

And what of the employer? The child who grows up to be the employer (but all report to someone else) are commanded:

Ephesians 6:9 And, ye masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threatening: knowing that YOUR MASTER ALSO IS IN HEAVEN; neither is there respect of persons with him.

To those who are fortunate enough to be the “boss” (though everyone has a boss), you are not to be puffed up or arrogant over those you have been blessed to lead. I’m reminded of the Centurion who came to Jesus at Capernaum. Though he was a high ranking Roman official, he went to Jesus, saying:

Matthew 8:6 (LSB) Lord, my servant is lying paralyzed at home, fearfully tormented.

He had an employee that he cared for, and sought Jesus to heal him. Jesus told him, “I will come and heal him”. But the Centurion said:

Matthew 8:8-13 (LSB) … Lord, I am not good enough for You to come under my roof, but just say the word, and my servant will be healed. 9 For I also am a man under authority, with soldiers under me; and I say to this man, ‘Go!’ and he goes, and to another, ‘Come!’ and he comes, and to my slave, ‘Do this!’ and he does it.” 10 Now when Jesus heard this, He marveled and said to those who were following, “Truly I say to you, I have not found such great faith with anyone in Israel. 11 And I say to you that many will come from east and west, and recline at the table with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven; 12 but the sons of the kingdom will be cast out into the outer darkness; in that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” 13 And Jesus said to the centurion, “Go; it shall be done for you as you have believed.” And the servant was healed that very moment.

This is the type of faith that God wants in His children. It is a faith that submits to authority, a faith that recognizes that proper order demands submission and love. Those who do not learn submission and respect as a child, grow up and find themselves in a place of “weeping and gnashing of teeth”. Children must be taught to obey and revere those who are their parents. Employees must obey and revere those who are over them. Employers are to respectfully look after those who are placed in their charge.

You may not like it, but that’s what the Bible tells us. And if you are a Christian, you will one day be judged on how you lived the life that God gifted you. Judgment day is coming. Are you ready for the evaluation?