Christ’s Word To The Family: John 19:25-27

John 19:25-27 Now there stood by the cross of Jesus His mother, and His mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene. 26 When Jesus therefore saw His mother, and THE DISCIPLE standing by, WHOM HE LOVED, He saith unto His mother, Woman, behold thy son! 27 Then saith He to THE DISCIPLE, Behold thy mother! And from that hour THAT DISCIPLE took her unto his own home.

You Should Honor The One Who Bore You

When God led His people Israel out of Egypt it took this ragtag group of ex-slaves about 50 days to get to Sinai (compare Exodus 12:37 to Exodus 19:1-2). God would commemorate their arrival at Sinai by establishing the Feast of Pentecost (also called Shavuot). At Pentecost, Israel went from being Jacob’s family to being God’s nation.

God planted the seed of Israel in Egypt. But God, not Egypt, bore Israel. God made Israel, called Israel, was a Father to Israel, and gave Israel His Law.

God gave Israel the Law, starting with the Ten Commandments. These Ten Commandments would be that basis on which all other laws would be based. I don’t have time to talk about the Ten Commandments today, but I want to focus on the FIFTH Commandment. The first four commandments told Israel to worship the God Who saved them out of Egypt. You should honor the One who bore you – and God gave Israel life. God was a Spiritual Father to Israel. In like manner, each person should honor the physical ones who bore them. This is what the Fifth Commandment tells us.

(Exodus 20:12 ESV) HONOR {kāḇaḏ} your father and your mother, that YOUR DAYS MAY BE LONG in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.

Word Study: The Hebrew kāḇaḏ means “to consider valuable, weighty. To respect and honor above ones self”. God’s people are to honor God. God’s people are to honor their parents.

When Pharaoh chased Israel to the Red Sea, God told Moses to “lift up your rod, stretch out your hand over the sea, and I will divide it so Israel can pass through” (Exodus 14:16). Then God said,

(Exodus 14:17-18 NKJV) … I indeed will harden the hearts of the Egyptians, and THEY SHALL FOLLOW THEM. So I WILL GAIN HONOR {kāḇaḏ} OVER PHARAOH and over all his army, his chariots, and his horsemen. [18] Then the Egyptians shall know that I [am] the LORD, when I HAVE GAINED HONOR {kāḇaḏ} for Myself over Pharaoh, his chariots, and his horsemen.”

God gave Pharaoh life, and numerous chances to do the right thing. God didn’t ask Pharaoh to LOVE Him – God doesn’t expect the lost to love Him. But God demanded kāḇaḏ, honor and respect. When Pharaoh refused to honor God, he paid the consequence. He and the Army of Egypt drowned in the Red Sea.

When you fail to honor God and fail to honor your parents, it can lead to a shortened lifespan.

Honor. Kāḇaḏ. The first Law that God gave humans insofar as they relate to other humans is that you will HONOR {kāḇaḏ} your father and your mother. God doesn’t demand that you love your parents. God doesn’t even demand that you like your parents. But you are to HONOR your parents. God goes on to say,

that your days MAY BE LONG IN THE LAND that the LORD your God is giving you

This is another way of saying “that you will have a long life”. When Pharaoh and the Egyptians didn’t honor God, their lives were cut short. When children do not honor their parents, their lives will be degraded and very possibly cut short.

This command is brought into the New Covenant. The Apostle wrote:

(Ephesians 6:1-3 NKJV) Children, OBEY YOUR PARENTS IN THE LORD for this is right. [2] Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: [3] that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.

To honor means to be obedient to, to respect. Children are not commanded to be obedient to evil parents, to parents who molest or are godless in behavior. The command is to “obey your parents IN THE LORD”. To respect and follow their lead. This is the foundation of a civilized nation. This is the foundation of the Kingdom of God, the Church. Children learn to honor and respect authority while in the family. Jesus honored His mother even from the Cross.

Jesus Is The Oldest Son Of Mary,
Herself A Believer In The God Of Scripture

Mary was an honorable mother. She was a woman who loved the Lord, engaged to be married to a godly man named Joseph, a carpenter. As she prepared to marry Joseph, the Angel Gabriel came to her. The Angel told her…

(Luke 1:28-29 NKJV) … Rejoice, highly favored [one], THE LORD IS WITH YOU; BLESSED ARE YOU AMONG WOMEN!” [29] But when she saw [him], SHE WAS TROUBLED at his saying, and considered what manner of greeting this was.

The Angel revealed to Mary a wondrous thing. She would be the fulfillment of God’s prophecy of Genesis 3:15. God was going to work through this young virgin, and her firstborn Son would be God’s Incarnate Son. God would become flesh through Mary. The Angel told her:

(Luke 1:31-33, 35 NKJV) … you will conceive in your womb and bring forth a Son, and shall call His name JESUS. [32] “He will be great, and WILL BE CALLED TO SON OF THE HIGHEST; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David. [33] “And He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and OF HIS KINGDOM THERE WILL BE NO END.” … [35] And the angel answered and said to her, “THE HOLY SPIRIT WILL COME UPON YOU, and the power of the Highest will overshadow you; therefore, also, THAT HOLY ONE WHO IS TO BE BORN WILL BE CALLED TO SON OF GOD.

God’s Son would be born into the world through Mary. But this puts Mary in a tough position. In her world, to be pregnant prior to marriage is anathema. But Mary trusted God, and believed His Word. She said without hesitation,

“I am the Lord’s servant. Let it be to me according to Your Word!” (Luke 1:38).

The Angel appeared to Joseph, Mary’s betrothed. Joseph honored God, and trusted His will. When both Joseph and Mary had to travel to Bethlehem because of the decree of Caesar, they had to lay the newborn Child in a manger. After Jesus was born, according to the requirements of the Law Mary and Joseph took Jesus to the Temple to present Him to the Lord. It was there that an old man named Simeon saw Jesus. Taking Jesus in his arms Simeon said,

(Luke 2:29-32 NKJV) Lord, now You are letting Your servant depart in peace, According to Your word; [30] For MY EYES HAVE SEEN YOUR SALVATION [31] Which You have prepared before the face of all peoples, [32] A light to [bring] revelation to the Gentiles, And the glory of Your people Israel.”

Simeon looked – not at Joseph and Mary, but just Mary and said:

(Luke 2:34-35 NKJV) Behold, this [Child] is destined for the fall and rising of many in Israel, and for a sign which will be spoken against [35] “(YES, A SOUL WILL PIERCE THROUGH YOUR OWN SOUL ALSO), that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.”

Mary and Joseph would watch Jesus grow up. The last time you hear about Joseph is when Jesus was twelve years old.

Mary and Joseph took the family to Jerusalem every year at the Feast of the Passover (Luke 2:41). Traveling with a caravan, they went up, then after the Feast ended they returned to Nazareth their home town. But Jesus was missing! He didn’t return with them! The Bible tells us that Mary and Joseph returned to Jerusalem. We read:

(Luke 2:46-49 NKJV) … after three days they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both listening to them and asking them questions. [47] And all who heard Him were astonished at His understanding and answers. [48] So when they saw Him, they were amazed; and His mother said to Him, “Son, why have You done this to us? Look, YOUR FATHER AND I HAVE SOUGHT YOU ANXIOUSLY.” [49] And He said to them, “WHY DID YOU SEEK ME? DID YOU NOT KNOW THAT I MUST BE ABOUT MY FATHER’S BUSINESS?”

That may have hurt Joseph’s feelings, because Joseph was Jesus’ stepfather, a carpenter. But Jesus was not being disrespectful to Joseph His stepfather. Jesus was honoring HIS Father by being at the Temple. The Bible tells us that “Jesus returned with them to Nazareth, AND WAS SUBJECT TO MARY AND JOSEPH” (Luke 2:51). Jesus honored His Heavenly Father. Jesus honored His mother and His stepfather.

Joseph is not mentioned again in Scripture after the incident of Luke 2. A good man, he passed into glory sometime after this. Only Mary is mentioned in the Gospels afterward.

We see Mary at the Wedding Feast in Cana of Galilee. Out of wine, Mary asked Jesus to help. Jesus turned water to wine at the request of His mother .… with some resistance.

(John 2:3-4 NKJV) … when they ran out of wine, the mother of Jesus said to Him, “They have no wine.” [4] Jesus said to her, “WOMAN {gynē}, what does your concern have to do with Me? MY HOUR HAS NOT YET COME.”

Preach! It was not time for Jesus to reveal Himself as Messiah. But Jesus honored the request of His mother. He kept the Fifth Commandment.

Though Jesus honored His mother, He never called her “mother” nor even “Mary”. Jesus called her “WOMAN”.

This was not out of disrespect. Mary was the handmaiden of God through whom Jesus was incarnate. But Mary had no special relationship to Jesus insofar as the Kingdom of God is concerned. When Jesus was teaching one day, we read:

(Matthew 12:46-50 NKJV) While {Jesus} was still talking to the multitudes, behold, HIS MOTHER AND BROTHERS stood outside, seeking to speak with Him. [47] Then one said to Him, “Look, YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR BROTHERS ARE STANDING OUTSIDE, seeking to speak with You.” [48] But He answered and said to the one who told Him, “WHO IS MY MOTHER, AND WHO ARE MY BROTHERS?” [49] And He stretched out His hand toward His disciples and said, “HERE ARE MY MOTHER AND MY BROTHERS! [50] “For WHOEVER DOES THE WILL OF MY FATHER IN HEAVEN IS MY BROTHER AND SISTER AND MOTHER.”

Jesus was not disrespecting Mary. Jesus was showing honor to His Heavenly Father. There are some in Christendom who believe that Mary is the Queen of Heaven, and that the saints should pray to Mary, and Mary will tell Jesus what to do. This is idolatry. I believe that Jesus looked down through eternity, and only called His mother “WOMAN” to tell us we do not worship or pray to Mary. Mary was saved by faith in God, as we all are. On hearing she would be the vessel of the Messiah, Mary said …

(Luke 1:47-48 NKJV) And MY SPIRIT HAS REJOICED IN GOD MY SAVIOR. [48] For He has regarded the LOWLY ESTATE OF HIS MAIDSERVANT; For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed.

Jesus addresses Mary directly as “WOMAN” twice in the Scripture. Once at the Wedding of Cana. And in today’s messsage, as He hangs on the Cross!

Mary’s Faith Led An Apostle Back To Jesus’ Cross

The Lord Jesus warned His disciples:

(Matthew 26:31 KJV) All of you SHALL BE OFFENDED {skandalizō} because of me this night: for it is written, I will smite the shepherd, and the sheep of the flock shall be scattered abroad.

All of the Apostles would run when Jesus was taken. They would be ashamed – scandalized – to be found in Jesus’ company. They ran because it was not safe to be with Jesus anymore. They were, in short, broken humans. Just like us.

When Jesus was hauled before the Sanhedrin and questioned by the High Priest, the Bible says “he asked Jesus ABOUT HIS DISCIPLES and HIS DOCTRINE” (John 18:19). Jesus said nothing of His disciples. What could He say? Multitudes had followed Him, crowds gathered around Him to hear His Word and be touched by Grace. Now they have reviled Him. The Bible says,

(1 Peter 2:23 NKJV) … when He was reviled, DID NOT REVILE IN RETURN; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but COMMITTED HIMSELF TO HIM WHO JUDGES RIGHTEOUSLY;

It was prophesied that when Jesus died, that

Isaiah 63:3 I have trodden the winepress alone, And from the peoples NO ONE WAS WITH ME.

As the nails were driven, none were with Jesus but His executioners, the thieves, and the unbelieving mockers in the crowd.

Matthew 27:55-56 … there were many women there, LOOKING ON FROM AFAR, who had followed Jesus from Galilee … among whom were Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James

Those who believed “stood at a distance” (Luke 23:49). None were with Jesus as the spikes were driven into His flesh. None but the soldiers and the thieves who died with Him. None but the mockers, the scoffers, the wicked who made sport of the Messiah. After the Cross was raised some came forward, led by Mary the mother of Jesus.

John 19:25 Now THERE STOOD BY THE CROSS OF JESUS HIS MOTHER, and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene.

Three Mary’s are there. At the foot of the Bleeding Savior his mother stands. Her name is first, because she was the first to overcome her fear and lead others to come with her. But the women are not the only ones there. One of the Apostles saw the women come forward, and he came with them.

The Disciple Whom Jesus Loved Stood
At The Foot Of The Cross

(John 19:26 KJV) When JESUS THEREFORE SAW HIS MOTHER, AND THE DISCIPLE STANDING BY, WHOM HE LOVED…

Only one disciple came back with Mary. He is called “THE DISCIPLE… WHOM JESUS LOVED”. Who is this man who does not even use his own name? He just calls himself “the disciple whom Jesus loved”. This nameless disciple was at the Last Supper. Where was he as Jesus and the eleven gathered around the table?

(John 13:23 KJV) Now there was leaning on Jesus’ bosom ONE OF HIS DISCIPLES, WHOM JESUS LOVED.

He is nearest the Master, leaning into Him for comfort. He is the weakest of the sheep, who want to cling to the Shepherd. After the resurrection Mary Magdalene would return to Christ’s tomb. She would run, and tell two men:

(John 20:2 KJV) Mary Magdalene runneth, and cometh to Simon Peter, and to THE OTHER DISCIPLE, WHOM JESUS LOVED, and saith unto them, They have taken away the Lord out of the sepulcher, and we know not where they have laid him.

Racing to the tomb, the disciple whom Jesus loved would outrun Peter (John 20:4). Why was he faster than Peter? Because he wanted to be near His Lord. When Peter got to the tomb, he was puzzled at the empty linen clothes and the napkin wrapped together. Peter was puzzled. But the disciple whom Jesus loved, the Bible says:

(John 20:8 KJV) Then went in also that OTHER DISCIPLE, WHICH CAME FIRST to the sepulcher, and HE SAW, AND BELIEVED.

Peter was puzzled, and anxious. But the disciple whom Jesus loved believed.

Who is this “disciple whom Jesus loved”? His name is never mentioned in the Book of John. He is humble. His identification is simply “the disciple whom Jesus loved”. We find out who he is at the end of this book. As the Book of John ends, Jesus tells Peter that he would eventually die crucifixion (John 21:18-19). After receiving this news, Peter turns and looks. We read:

(John 21:20-22, 24 NKJV) .. Peter, turning around, SAW THE DISCIPLE WHOM JESUS LOVED FOLLOWING, who also had leaned on His breast at the supper… [21] Peter, seeing him, said to Jesus, “But LORD, WHAT ABOUT THIS MAN?” [22] Jesus said to him, “IF I WILL THAT HE REMAIN UNTIL I COME, what [is that] to you? You follow Me.” … [24] THIS IS THE DISCIPLE WHO TESTIFIES OF THESE THINGS, AND WROTE THESE THINGS; and we know that his testimony is true.

John is the disciple whom Jesus loved. In his fear, this little lamb ran away with the other disciples when the soldiers came. He stood far off with the women, rather than near to his Master. But when Mary the mother of Jesus came forward, the disciple whom Jesus loved came and stood with her. He came back to where he should have been all along – near to the Great Shepherd of our souls.

Let’s return to the foot of the Cross. Jesus is the eldest Son of Mary, the Son of God Almighty, the Savior of the world. On the Cross He is bringing us eternal redemption. But as He looks down from that Cross, Jesus sees His mother. As the eldest Son living, it is His responsibility to care for His mother. Joseph is gone. All have run away. We read:

(John 19:26-27 KJV) When Jesus therefore saw His mother, and THE DISCIPLE standing by, WHOM HE LOVED, He saith unto His mother, WOMAN, BEHOLD THY SON! [27] Then saith HE TO THE DISCIPLE, BEHOLD THY MOTHER! And FROM THAT HOUR THE DISCIPLE TOOK HER INTO HIS OWN HOME.

When John returned to the Master’s side, Jesus did not rebuke him for running away. He gave His mother to John to care for. He commanded His mother to receive John as if he were her own – and for John to care for Mary as his own mother. What a blessed commission.

When you cease wandering from Christ, and come to His side, He will bless you beyond your wildest imagination. Do as John did. Come back to the foot of the Cross!

Jesus will soon die, and will lay in a grave for three days and three nights. At the end of that time, Peter and John will race to the empty tomb. Going into the tomb, Peter will be puzzled, but John will believe. The Bible tells us that …

(John 20:10 KJV) Then the disciples went away again UNTO THEIR OWN HOME.

Jesus put Mary in John’s care. John took her into his own home. As soon as he believed at the empty tomb, John hastened to go home to see Mary, to tell her what would mend her broken heart. Jesus is alive. The tomb is empty. Death is defeated. Your Son is, indeed, the Son of God.

Preach! Have you ever wondered why all of the disciples but John died at the hands of men? Some died by sword. Paul was beheaded. Peter and Andrew crucified. Thomas speared to death. Philip hanged. James the Less thrown from the Temple and beaten to death. Simon sawn in two. But John – the disciple whom Jesus loved – died naturally, of old age. Why?

Preach! Because Jesus gave John a duty at the foot of that Cross. He was to look after Mary until she died. Jesus told Peter that he would die by crucifixion, but that the disciple whom He loved would live until He returned. And John did. John saw Jesus on Patmos, and some time after that passed into glory.

Behold The Son! Behold The Lamb Of God!

John and Mary stood by the Cross. And it was at the Cross that blessing came. I want to end with these words from A.W. Pink:

Mary stood by the Cross. And as she stood there, the Savior exclaimed, “Woman, behold thy Son” (John 19:26). There, summed up in a single word, is expressed the need of every descendant of Adam – to turn they eye away from the world, off from self, and to look by faith to the Savior that dioed for sinners. There is the divine epitome of the Way of salvation. Deliverance from the wrath to come, forgiveness of sins, acceptance with God, is obtained not by deed of merit, not by good works, not by religious ordinances; No, salvation comes by Beholding – ‘Behold, the Lamb of God which taketh away the sin of the world’. … There is life in a look … Have you seen Him dying on the Cross, the Just for the unjust, that He might bring us to God? Mary the mother of Christ needed to ‘behold’ Him, and so do you. Then look, look unto Christ and be ye saved.”

Honor the Father by honoring the Son. Believe on Him, receive Him at the foot of the Cross, and follow Him both today and every day into eternity. Amen.